Where Did The Time Go?

I have absolutely no idea where the last month went, I know I spent some of it unwell which stopped me in my tracks for a little while, but all the plans I had for the month disappeared in the blink of an eye.

What happened? Where did it go? Was I procrastinating too long over random stuff again ? I am annoyed that I missed my personal deadline for getting my novel published but it has to be much better than it currently is before I release it into the world. There is still a lot of editing to do, I don’t feel I truly know everything about it yet, that world and it’s inhabitants and being laid up for most of the month meant it didn’t get to where I wanted it to be. So new deadline made and off I go.

I am not giving up, not this time. I found I learnt a lot more about myself in the last year, yes I procrastinate a lot, but I recognise this fact more easily now; notice the warning signs and breathe.

Bob has even been speaking to me more now..(see last blog re who Bob is)

But Bob seems to have this mean streak at the moment. Yes he is talking to me, but he is choosing the most inopportune moments to do so.

I actually had some great ideas, new characters, new details appearing out of the fog for another project which I have been working on in between editing The Calling but when does Bob choose to hand me these golden nuggets?

Has it been on one of the many occasions when I have been sitting, staring at a blank page, pen in hand ready to listen to Bob? Or has is it been in those half asleep moments in between being awake and being asleep, where I desperately need to switch my brain off and sleep in readiness for the following day?

Yep you guessed it, the latter.I feel like he is testing me, testing my resolve to write more. I can almost hear him laughing at me, I think he even has this little annoying smirk on his face as he whispers these little gems in my ear, knowing full well I will have to write them down. Previously I would have ignored him and just hoped I would remember it the following day and drifted off, knowing really that I probably never would.

But this time, I am not ready to give up, I am not ready to just sleep on it. This new sense determination is new to me, so I open one bleary eye, grab whatever I have to hand..my phone or my notebook and make whatever brief notes I can before the true fog of sleep descends. So now when I get back to my empty piece of paper, pen in hand, I at least now know I have somewhere to start and I can’t help but wonder if there wouldn’t be a smirk on my face right back at Bob.